'I write because I know how, it’s how I breath, it’s how I know. It’s my weapon of all weapons, drawing the silver linings to clouds, giving pictures a meaning and colors definition. I write because I think, I think too much and do too little. It is within my burning soul to write and somehow find answers in between those lines. To tell a story, maybe a survival story , maybe to record that I was here and I too somehow made up this universe during my time. Let me write… let me breath. ' Amanda
Saturday, May 29, 2010
I've fallen & I can't get up.
I've tried to look beyond the words that I fear would be there in fine print. Soon I saw them, my heart shattered, my eyes close and my body shook. Eyes close, darkness consume me and DAMN was all I can think. How did I let myself fall this far down the hole? I got lost in this path, and I look from left to right and there's no one in sight. I hear the voices but I don't see anyone. I've fallen & I can't get up. All of a sudden this chair I sit in feel huge as I shrink into it. I don't think there's a comeback for this one, I've fallen many times but I've always risen above. I've crawled out the many holes I've fallen, but THIS ONE, THIS ONE I feel it deep in my soul that there's no coming back from it. I rarely apologize for shit I've done but for this, this alone I apologize from the bottom of my empty heart. I've really fallen beyond return. Feel like a soldier missing in action. I'm in a dry dessert and I can't see what's in front of me. I can't even see my feet. Through all this there's a light shining on me emphasizing on flaws and all. I'll whisper my apologizes for the wind to carry to you. This is the END of me I swear.
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